Hadley, The Brave

I went and saw the movie American Sniper today.  I knew what happened in the movie, because I had read the book as soon as it came out.  I was also aware of the ending, a dark cloud that hung over the entire movie.  American Sniper moved me, but I am not ready to write about it yet.  However, I will say a big congrats to Aunt Kristin. She worked with the star of the movie, Bradley Cooper, helping him with his diet.  She has been mentioned by name by Bradley a few times in the past couple of weeks.

Anyway, there was a particular scene early on that stood out to me.  It was a scene where young Chris is at a table with his (younger) brother and parents.  His father begins to tell an abbreviated version of  this story:

Most of the people in our society are sheep. They are kind, gentle, productive creatures who can only hurt one another by accident. We may well be in the most violent times in history, but violence is still remarkably rare. This is because most citizens are kind, decent people who are not capable of hurting each other, except by accident or under extreme provocation. They are sheep.

Then there are the wolves and the wolves feed on the sheep without mercy. Do you believe there are wolves out there who will feed on the flock without mercy? You better believe it. There are evil men in this world and they are capable of evil deeds. The moment you forget that or pretend it is not so, you become a sheep. There is no safety in denial.

Then there are sheepdogs and I'm a sheepdog. I live to protect the flock and confront the wolf. If you have no capacity for violence then you are a healthy productive citizen, a sheep. If you have a capacity for violence and no empathy for your fellow citizens, then you have defined an aggressive sociopath, a wolf. But what if you have a capacity for violence, and a deep love for your fellow citizens? What do you have then? A sheepdog, a warrior, someone who is walking the unchartered path. Someone who can walk into the heart of darkness, into the universal human phobia, and walk out unscathed.

We know that the sheep live in denial; that is what makes them sheep. They do not want to believe that there is evil in the world. They can accept the fact that fires can happen, which is why they want fire extinguishers, fire sprinklers, fire alarms and fire exits throughout their kids schools. But many of them are outraged at the idea of putting an armed police officer in their kid school. Our children are thousands of times more likely to be killed or seriously injured by school violence than fire, but the sheep only response to the possibility of violence is denial. The idea of someone coming to kill or harm their child is just too hard, and so they chose the path of denial.

The sheep generally do not like the sheepdog. He looks a lot like the wolf. He has fangs and the capacity for violence. The difference, though, is that the sheepdog must not, can not and will not ever harm the sheep. Any sheep dog who intentionally harms the lowliest little lamb will be punished and removed. The world cannot work any other way, at least not in a representative democracy or a republic such as ours. Still, the sheepdog disturbs the sheep. He is a constant reminder that there are wolves in the land. They would prefer that he didn't tell them where to go, or give them traffic tickets, or stand at the ready in our airports, in camouflage fatigues, holding an M-16. The sheep would much rather have the sheepdog cash in his fangs, spray paint himself white, and go, Baa. Until the wolf shows up; then the entire flock tries desperately to hide behind one lonely sheepdog.

It is a story very relevant to our society issues today.  Regardless, the story was told to the young Kyle boys to instill in them a sense of protection.  Specifically, it was about the older brother Chris taking care of his younger brother.  The younger brother was being picked on at school, Chris had come to his defense in a fist fight. The father was adamant that they do not start fights, but they do finish them.  Most importantly, you stick up for your brother.  I leaned over to my friend that I was at the movie with and said "my father had that very same talk with my brother and I."

I recall one time when I was younger, I couldn't have been more than 5 or 6, getting bullied by some guy I didn't even know.  I really don't remember anything about the dude.  The only thing I remember was Patrick coming to my defense.  It was the first time I ever heard of a thing called a fight.  I once found  myself in the Principal's office because (as a 7th grader) I had gotten into it with an 8th grader who was picking on a bunch of folks.  I knew it was all a formality, because both the principal and my folks had no issue with me causing a ruckus for the reason I did.  I was taking up for someone getting picked on.  

It was one of those family lessons that really stuck with. While I have all girls, I have tried very hard to pass on to them that very same belief.  I do this to the point that I don't event let them fight with each other.  It is not acceptable.  On numerous occasions I have told them that no one else will be there for them except the four of them.  I have even said that there will come a time when Mom and Dad won't be around anymore to take up for them, so they must do it for each other.  We have spent time at dinner talking about Reagan's responsibility she has in always sticking up for Caroline.  I don't want anyone picking on Caroline, Reagan must not allow any of their mutual friends do that.  Caroline must do the same for Baylor Grace, and BG must do it for Hadley. At the end of the day, all they will have is the four of them. You never know how these lessons are going to take with girls, particularly young girls. No matter what, I won't stop preaching it.

The other day, Hadley and Baylor Grace were walking after school with their mother.  There was a boy at the corner who is known to be sort of a bully.  He was throwing snow balls at people when they would pass.  Apparently, no one felt the need to say anything to him.  That is, until he made the mistake of throwing one at Baylor Grace.  This set Hadley Blaine into a fit of rage.  "HEY, DON'T YOU THROW A SNOW BALL AT MY SISTER!"  Brooke said that she practically had to restrain Hadley from going after the boy.  He was bigger, he was a stranger to her, and he was a boy.  Hadley didn't care.  Don't you pick on her sister.

It gave me a little hope.  Hope, that when the day does come that Brooke and I aren't around,  that the girls are going to be alright.  They will have each other.